TV: Modern Family 3.11 “Lifetime Supply” Best Lines

Posted: January 5, 2012 in Best Lines, Television
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Modern Family 3.11 “Lifetime Supply” (***) — Phil misses a call from his doctor with test results and assumes the worst. Mitchell and Cam argue over the trophies they’re putting up for display. Meanwhile, Jay takes Manny to a horse race and Gloria teaches Haley Spanish.

“I look at a Chuck Norris or a Clint Eastwood and there’s no reason I can’t stay tough….oh! Tickles…” — Phil

“I need you to bend over.” — Doctor
“Well, let’s dim the lights, crank up the Norah Jones, and get this over with.” — Phil

“What are you going for here?” — Jay
“Matt Damon in Bagger Vance. I thought that was obvious here.” — Manny

“Look at our trophies up there. We’re a couple of winners, aren’t we?” — Cam
“Are we?” — Mitchell

“I assure you, you are fine.” — Claire
“That’s very comforting, coming from a marketing major at a party school.” — Phil

“You may be flying high now, but soon you’ll be free falling, Tom Petty. Because you’re petty. Tom Petty. Get it?” — Cam
“About three sentences ago.” — Mitchell

“Why do I even need to learn Spanish? I live in California.” — Haley

“I was so glad I talked to Alex because she agreed with everything I was feeling, which made realize that I…was acting like a 14-year old girl.” — Mitchell

“Tough break, Jay. Here…a little something for gas.” — Manny

“Nooo! I didn’t say he got bad news. I said he was getting bad news.” — Gloria

“That is the most irresponsible, unprofessional thing I have ever heard of in my entire life and do you have anyone to represent you…..in the sale of your current house?” — Phil

“Stop staring.” — Mitchell
:::Cam creepily stares at Javier:::

“I am a fan of hip hop, though I try to stay neutral in the East Coast-West coast thang.” — Phil

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