TV: Modern Family 3.16 “Virgin Territory” Best Lines

Posted: February 23, 2012 in Best Lines, Television
Tags: ,

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Modern Family 3.16 “Virgin Territory” (***) — It’s a day of disturbing realizations when Mitchell manages to ruin one of Jay’s proudest golf moments, Phil overhears something that may forever change how he sees his little girl, and Gloria stumbles upon Claire’s dangerous little secret.

“Did you check your car in the um…” — Gloria
“Trunk.” — Jay
“Because that’s where you found the thing that you thought that you gave me a long time ago…the umm…” — Gloria
“Pizza cutter. Give me another one.” — Jay

“Daddy, you ruined brunch.” — Lily
“This ends today.” — Manny

“She’s like a dream wrapped in a wish poured into jeggings.” — Manny

“We’ll use these cookies as bait. Lily is crazy for them.” — Luke
“Asian metabolism.” — Manny

“Do I need to give you a Swedish massage? Accent optional?” — Phil

“There are blind models? That’s so sad. They cannot see how pretty they are.” — Gloria

“We’re going to have to settle this dispute in court. The food court. The honorable judge Cinnabon presiding.” — Phil

“Revenge is a dish best served cold. And even better two days later out of a 24-oz microwave friendly Burt sealed pack in store.” — Cam

“She promised not to tell dad till after I left for college, which means, he might have never found out.” — Haley

“Yoga is good for the meditation. Yoga is good for the mmm…” — Gloria

“Is that twenty bucks for each of us or both of us?” — Luke
“Both.” — Cam
“That’s what I thought.” — Luke, smiling

“I can’t unlearn how to treat a lady. But what does that make me? Waiting till I’m 40 when she looks me up on Facebook after a failed first marriage?” — Manny

“You did good, Thelma.” — Luke
“Please stop calling me that. I hate that movie.” — Manny
“What movie?” — Luke

“I know on the outside I look like I have everything together.” — Claire
“No, not really.” — Gloria

“You’re unbelievable. Just when I peg you as…” — Mitchell
“Storms Stevens! That’s it!” — Jay

“We’re bad boys now.” — Manny
“I like that. Bad boys.” — Luke
“Your mom. Ahhh!!!” — Manny

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