TV: The Office 8.20 “Welcome Party” Best Lines

Posted: April 13, 2012 in Best Lines, Television
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The Office 8.20 “Welcome Party” (***) — As Erin and Andy plot how he should break up with Jessica, Robert California orders the office to throw a welcome party for Nellie.

“The man has worked here for 25 years. How can none of us picture his face?” — Jim
“Cause we come here to do our jobs. We don’t stick our noses in other people’s business.” — Angela

“Which one of these looks more right?” — Pam
“Neither of those looks like anyone who has ever existed or been imagined in the history of human insanity.” — Dwight

“Is this a video conference you’re having with Drake featuring Swizz Beatz?” — Robert

“I never believed will power was very important in a woman.” — Robert

“This monologue you’re delivering is very offensive.” — Oscar
“Ay, caramba! The natives are getting restless.” — Nellie
“Who’s a native?” — Stanley

“I knew you as a lover, but I’ll remember you as a gentleman.” — Erin, pretending to be Jessica

“Don’t listen to him. Have you ever seen him play Tetris? Oh, I think I’m going to use this line horizontally. Oh I have no idea what a gift this line is.” — Dwight

“We’re planning this party for Nellie and we’re going to make it really bad.” — Pam
“Sounds like every other party.” — Jim

“I wonder if king sized sheets are called presidential in England.” — Dwight

“We can’t change course at this point.” — Oscar
“What are you talking about? Of course we can.” — Pam
“What I mean to say is I don’t want to.” — Oscar

“You want a gummy penis?” — Andy

“Everyone get comfy now. This first song is over half an hour long.” — Creed

“You’re breaking up with me?” — Jessica
“No. You always do this. You twist my words around. Part of me says we should end this right now.” — Andy

“You want honesty. Super honesty time. I’m gay.” — Andy

“I was faking it every time. I had to imagine I was in a steam room with John Stamos.” — Andy

“That’s not a real knot. When you pull on it, it disappears.” — Pam
“WHAT THE HELL?!” — Magician

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