TV: Modern Family 3.24 “Baby on Board” Best Lines

Posted: June 3, 2012 in Best Lines, Television
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Modern Family 3.24 “Baby on Board” (****) — Mitchell and Cam get notice that their next adopted baby is getting delivered today. Alex and Haley prepare for prom. Meanwhile, Jay and Manny take Lily to her recital.

“That woman from Clexico. She picked us.” — Mitchell
“She did?!” — Cam
“She went into early labor. She’s having the baby today.” — Mitchell
“She is?!” — Cam
“We have to go to Clexico right now.” — Mitchell
“We do?!” — Cam
“Just assume everything I’m saying is the truth.” — Mitchell

“I was outside for two minutes.” — Mitchell
“I kept it in as long as I could. WE’RE HAVING A BABY!!!” — Cam

“My guidance counselor suggested I take a gap year. You know — a year between high school and college where you take some courses, have some life experiences, and get inspired. And obviously, work at The Gap.” — Haley

“Gloria, would you mind coming with us? We need someone who actually knows how to speak Spanish.” — Mitchell
“Frio. Muy frio.” — Cam

“No, no, no. Arms down here says I’m white and I’m sorry. Arms up here says you don’t know what I am.” — Phil

“You look adorable.” — Claire
“Adorable? I’m not a puppy.” — Alex
“It was meant as a compliment.” — Claire
“Honey, I got this. You look sexy.” — Phil
“Ew.” — Alex
Well, we tried everything.” — Phil

“Do you want me to touch up your hair, honey?” — Claire
“Oh no. I’m good.” —

“Are you doing sex?” — Luke

“What was that for?” — Mitchell
“The nurse stole her grandmother’s almonds.” — Cam
No. The nurse is mad at Juanita because Juanita stole her lover. And Juanita is mad at the nurse because the nurse told her grandmother about the baby.” — Gloria

“It’s really important for Lily’s self-esteem that she goes on. I think one of you should go talk to her.” — Lily’s teacher
“You know she stinks, right?” — Manny
“And I think it should be you.” — Lily’s teacher (to Jay)

“Can I borrow that purple dress I said you were too old for?” — Haley
“In spite of that, yes.” — Claire



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