TV: Community 3.20 “Digital Estate Planning” Best Lines

Posted: June 8, 2012 in Best Lines, Television
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Community 3.20 “Digital Estate Planning” (****) — Pierce and the gang attempt to win his father’s inheritance through a video game.

“Before that, I was just a teenager who read the Bible to him in the bathtub.” — Gilbert

“How about that check….soul brother.” — Pierce

“Which one is me? I assume nothing because I’m not racist.” — Britta

“Peace. Love.” — Hippie
“Aw.” — Annie
“Annie. Stop saying aw to everything.” — Troy
“Don’t be jaded. He’s saying peace.” — Annie
“Sex.” — Hippie
“Did he say sex?” — Shirley

“Pierce. Point the joystick right.” — Annie
“So I’m supposed to just guess that? What are the instructions?” — Pierce

“I designed this game upon my death by you and whatever cabal fruit of juggies and sluts you call your friends.” — Cornelius
“Her name is Britta.” — Pierce

“I guess there’s no hug button.” — Britta

“What are you doing?” — Shirley
“He was suffering!” — Annie
“Yeah. From ax wounds.” — Shirley

“Here’s the thing about women, Jeff. We don’t hack and slash our way through life because we’re one with life.” — Britta

“Where are your clothes?” — Abed
“Pierce taught me poker. I’m not good at it.” — Troy

“He’s shooting lightning and I’m naked!” — Troy

“Abed. She’s a program.” — Britta
“People have said similar things about me.” — Abed
“Uh oh. He’s playing the Rain Man card. Let’s bounce. — Pierce

“I don’t know what’s more offensive. The actual racism. Or the insulting notion that it might somehow rub off on us. Look out! Jive turkeys. Kill them before they start multiplying.” — Britta

“What? That can’t be true. You’re half….white!” — Pierce

“We’re better. We died and respawned. That makes us heroes.” — Jeff

“She can make babies for me!” — Abed
“Oh and I can’t?! I can’t…” — Troy

“He once sat on me church just so he could see better.” — Gilbert

“Are you always carrying that?” — Annie, referring to Pierce’s gun
“Not in the shower.” — Pierce

“Mulatto. Is that okay or is that borderline?” — Pierce

“Cool cool cool” — Baby


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