TV: Community 3.21 “First Chang Dynasty” Best Lines

Posted: June 8, 2012 in Best Lines, Television
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Community 3.21 “First Chang Dynasty” (***1/2) — The group plan an elaborate heist to rescue Dean Pelton away from Chang.

“Of course. The head of security at Greendale Community Colleege has kidnapped the dean and replaced him with a deanoganger.” — Officer Cackowski
“Well, when you say it that way, it sounds ridiculous.” — Jeff
“The word we used was doppledeaner.” — Troy

“Look. I hate cops…………” — Britta

“Love is not admissible evidence. I’m working on a cop opera.” — Officer Cackowski
“Copera!” — Everyone
“Polisical!” — Pierce

“Dance off? Sundae bar? One of those Ed Hardy magicians? What kind of monster would…photo booths with props!” — Troy

“Where is the key?” — Troy
:::cut scene to key around Chang’s neck:::
“Well, where is it?” — Troy
“Oh sorry. Very sorry in my head. The key is around Chang’s neck.” — Murray

“Not a lot of people get a second chance. Just you and probably, Barack Obama.” — Murray

“Do you know how long someone as sarcastic as I am would last in prison? Suuuch a long time.” — Jeff

“We just need to plan an elaborate heist.” — Jeff
“Great. I’ll get my turban.” — Pierce
“Everyone but Pierce has to plan an elaborate heist.” — Jeff

“You’re in the getaway van because your Swami act is notoriously horrible.” — Jeff
“A. That is racist. B. Swamis can’t drive. They’re Indians!” — Pierce

“I’m in!” — Britta
“I know.” — Annie
“Everybody else got to say it.” — Britta

“Sar. Cas. Tic. Claps.” — Chang

“Chang. You’re insane. You’re into keytar?” — Troy

“Fire can’t burn through door, stupid. It’s not a ghost.” — Chang

“We need a distraction.” — Shirley
“You heard the lady. Take your tops off.” — Pierce

“Which wire do I cut?” — Abed
“There’s only one.” — Troy

“Karl. Richie. Let me exchang.” — Chang

“Nobody can sit on something this big.” — Karl
“I’ll sit on it.” — Dean Pelton

“I made a pledge, to follow this school’s failures and spit out degrees. Because that’s what deans do.” — Dean Pelton

“A man is only as good as his word. Or a nod to the camera with a black…” — Troy

“Shirley. Never change. Or do if you want. I’m not your boss.” — Troy

“Never wear a rubber.” — Pierce
“Never listen to Pierce.” — Jeff

“This is a lock of my hair.” — Britta
“Creepy…” — Troy


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