TV: South Park 16.7 “Cartman Finds Love” Best Lines

Posted: June 8, 2012 in Best Lines, Television
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South Park 16.7 “Cartman Finds Love” (***1/2) — A new girl arrives at the school, and Cartman immediately tries to bring her and Token together because they’re both black. One man stands in the way though…Kyle.

“He’s just a little sick, Mr. Garrison. He’s got boner-itis.” — Cartman

“Yeah, just don’t touch me cause I’m not into girls. It kind of grosses me out.” — Cartman

“Love is like taking a dump. Sometimes, it works itself out. But sometimes, you need to give it a nice hard, slimy push.” — Cartman

“You’re my ray of sunshine, Cupid Me.” — Cartman
“Tee hee hee.” — Cupid Cartman

“Look at how happy they are. Is it cause you want to ruin that or because you’re homophobic.” — Cartman

“She’s going to have to deal with racist people out there. People turning their hands and saying ‘Look at the two black people together. That figures.'” — Nicole’s dad

“Have some turkey.” — Nicole’s mom
Yeah. Try the white meat. I know it’s a little dry. But there’s a lot more of it.” — Nicole’s dad

“They’ll find love somewhere else.” — Butters
“No they won’t.” — Cartman
“Yes they will.” — Butters
“No they won’t. Shut up, Butters. You’re an asshole.” — Cartman

“So I’m saying if someone were to step in, it would be okay?” — Kyle
“I’m sorry, Kyle. I like girls.” — Token
“Huh? Dude. What the fuck?!” — Kyle

“I can’t be constipated on the job. So that’s why I need soft serve. Because when I’m constipated, sometimes you need more than a hard push.” — Constipation commercial

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